Fuck my life.

We need to meet people who don't drink. Or, even better, people who aren't threatened by the fact that we don't drink. 'Cause I'm not exactly wanting to meet people who are fanatical about being sober, 'cause in my experience, they're kind of weird and overwhelming.

*sigh*

It's really fucking sad to think that we've been drinking for SO LONG that after we quit, we can't think of anything to do other than go to a bar.

Or go shopping and spend gratuitous amounts of money that we could be saving to move to Seattle :/

I dunno. What the hell do sober people do? Literally EVERYTHING innocent I can think of (skating, bowling, shows) eventually leads to someone wanting to shove booze in our faces. I know one day I'll be able to handle that kind of situation better, but right now I just don't think I can handle the pressure.

This is killing me. I spend hours racking my brain for things to go out and do. When I finally deduce that there's nothing to do (for lack of money or whatever), all I can think about is painting. And I don't have half the shit I need to start on that. It's really goddamn frustrating. I've got two gallons of white paint and a standard roller and tray, but that's it. I need an extending one for the ceiling, painting tape and a bunch of tarps would be good, heh. Plus I need to wash the shit out of the walls again.

So instead, I clear all the trash out of our room, pick everything up, put it away and get on the computer. Or read. Or sometimes write, which lately has only been making me crazy because my hand can't move fast enough to keep up with my brain. I'm so used to typing everything nowadays.

The job: frustrating. Let's just say I'm not exactly a fan of new bosses starting, them kissing your ass and trying to "get to know you" and act like your friend just so they can better control you. Maybe I'm crazy to think that way, but it's happened to me just like that before. Also, not a fan of bosses who sit and brag about their expensive lives. This lady won't shut up about her goddamn iphone (you know those people who refer to their phones by name instead of saying "my phone"? That's her.). Or how she drove "the other car" to work today. And she unloads stuff she just shouldn't on us about her daughter's relationship problems. Which IMMEDIATELY reminded me of Kris. I DON'T WANT ANOTHER KRIS. I don't want to feel like I have to pass out heaps of fucking sympathy to my co-workers. I JUST WANT TO GO TO WORK TO WORK! *I* don't fucking sit around at work and bitch about my life to everyone! Goddamn! The rest of us just kinda quote ridiculous movies to each other and joke around.

Yeah, I need a new job. And soon. I'm losing my mind there.

I need to go clean something.